A Dan Had Drifted or ADHD and thoughts about God

I'm in my Social Psychology class getting lost in my thoughts. My last class we talked about Attention Deficit Hypetactivity Disorder. We watched a video on the topic. It showed the three characteristics Inpulsivity, Hyperactivity, and Unattentiveness. I happened to have this particular brain disorder also known as a invisible disorder. Many do well in one on one settings (which i do). and have trouble in groups (amen). I am very impulsive, very impulsive. I have to always be doing something, fidgiting, talking, thinking, moving and shaking. I can't focus on my schoolwork, cleaning, im very inconsistent and it frustrates me. I'm also an impulsive spender, which again is frustrating. It's an interesting struggle and some have a learning disability with reading, math, or writting (yep) and have to get help with special edcucation in school (yep). With the unattentiveness its explains why i'm writting and not paying attention to the instructor. I'm stuck on the topic of ADHD. Even though in Social Psychology we are learning about Social Cognition and Fundamental Attribution Error (which is actually interesting but i really wanted to write). and my behavioral or developmental disorder. I want to write which is rare, but what i really to write about is....God.

It's become a passion of mine lately. I'm reading a book called "Becoming the Answer to Our Prayers" by Shane Claiborne and Jonathan Wilson-Hartgrove. Wonderful Book! Wonderful! But one of the parts that stuck out to me was about politics and faith. Political Right versus Left or Christian Left versus Right and we forget about God's people. Look im pretty far left. I'm not Conservative. I like to think about the social justice and welfare of people. But to that extent only i can think but i never act. I like all Christians am a hypocrite and falliable, flawed, broken and hurt.

during a trip to St. Louis for Intervarsity, our instrucctor Gerry prayed the simple prayer "i want my heart to be broken by the same ways God's heart breaks." We clearly live in an independent culture here in America. I'm amazed by trstimonies of truly living in community or extreme acts of love, like the book 3 cups of tea, or Richard Stearns "Hole in the Gospel." Acts of humbly helping others (and i'm not talking about paying for fast food for the car behind you in the drive thru or occasionally holding the door for a guy/girl in a wheelchair without making eye contact with the person). its the acts that we need to do consistently and creativily. The people who challenge the comforts that makes us slaves or even closes minds. The people who could careless about the left versus right debate but care solely on what God's love looks like and ways to express it. I'm having so much trouble finding spots where God is in people at times. Do i see God in the hatred shown for the women going into the abortion clinic or the group codemning her for entering? Your obvious answer is both right? Can i forgive and reconcile a sex offender and see God in that person? The answer is an easy yes right? We are too love all people and not to judge. Thats what Jesus says we should do.
Two days after the earthquake happened in Haiti my mom was with her friend who works at a car dealership and she saw a guy living the lot with a 75,000 dollars car. Just like that. It was hard to love that person or the idea when she told me the story, especially after i read about a guy whose job it was to bulldoze the earth and pile on random bodies to a mass grave. Talk about Post Traumatic Stress! But how do you love that guy and if i was in his shoes what type of blindspots and justifications would i present. Remember its not the guy its the concept, but i take on too judging the guy. We all have ADHD when it comes to certain issues, where unattentive, impulsive, and hyperactive.

So much hate, where is the love. Wheres the reconcilation? Where is the hope? What are thinks to really think about? Right now im writting probably wearing clothes that were made by a child or women in a sweatshop. He/she probably didn't make shit for his labor and is starving. I'm so guilty and filthy. Is that what we think about when shopping? By made in China does that mean by a child? Was the person treated fairly? It would like having some truth shown on the show "How its Made." By that i mean, i want you to school me on How hot dogs are made. We don't want to know.

I'm scared too death about what my niece will be exposed to. She will be told to listen and not be heard, that the more she subtracts---the more she adds. Our culture will tell her that physically less is more. Advertising hurts. Shes going to have to be exposed to the cries of the world, the murders of television, the issues of covert/overt racism, perhaps eating disorders, she will be exposed to the cries of our brothers and sisters whose cries carry through the winds and tears evaporate into the very rain drops that fall on our heads.

She needs the love love love!!!

I came home to my family having lunch and now my grandma is holding my niece. Both showing beauty, grace and love that God created. My grandfather just told me about the struggles between the right versus left. It's about minds, sometimes the Evangelical right is about as open minded as a dead turkey. We are here cause of HE, not here because of ME. We need to take care of what is his. There are so much, so much pain in the world and let's all become advocates for christ. Ambassadors of peace and swtand next to our brothers and sisters on not on their throats. We need to act upon loving each other and not "act like" we love each other. We need to simply do what Micah 6:8 challenges us to do...act justly, and to love mercy and to walk humbly with God.

"Jesus was a rebel who was countercultural" from Lecrea "Rebel intro.

-Watch the movies "Killing us Softly" "War Dance" "Blood Diamond"

Smile at a stranger in the hallway.
-Apologize and make ammends and mean it.
Dance in the streets
-write a letter the old fashion way
give hugs hugs hugs!!
See the beauty of God in your enemy
say your prayers and love.